Bailey is the model big sister, being so loving and comforting to Foster. But I can recognize how she shows her jealousy now. She tries to get attention by complaining (I'm hungry, I don't like it, I've got a boo boo, I'm hot, I'm itchy) or she's always asking me for something (I want snack, want candy, want playschool, want Christmas, want Grandma, want bye-bye, want doctor...) Doctor?! Yes, she always wants to go to the doctor. When we took Foster to get shots and I got a flu shot, Bailey wanted shots too. We have such a strange child. She'll even cry when we leave the dentist or doctor sometimes. Like she didn't get poked and prodded enough to her satisfaction. Maybe I should get her a doctor kit for Christmas. I'm not going to complain about her liking the doctor but I'm constantly explaining to her that she doesn't need to go. The "I wants" are usually something I can't give her at the moment. So when I tell her "not right now" or "later" or just "no". It's crying and whining and sometimes a full on fit. She'll even pester me about being hungry when she just ate 30 min. ago. But I think what she really wants is either attention, candy, or she's really just thirsty.
We also argue about everything. I knew if I ever had a girl she would turn out just like me in the stubborn-got-to-have-it-my-way department. She is super sweet, gentle, social, and very empathetic. "Mommy, you grumpy." But she has to argue with us about EVERYTHING. Just today:
Me: "We are having apples. What are apples, fruits or vegetables?"
Bailey: "Vegetables!"
Me: "Well no, actually they are fruits."
Bailey: "No! Apples are vegetables."
Me: "No, fruit. What color are apples?"
Bailey: "Red!"
Me: "That's right. And some apples are green."
Bailey: "No, red. Apples are red!"
Me: "Right, and some are green."
Bailey: "No, apples are red mommy!" starting to cry and fuss.
Me: "Bailey, don't argue with mommy."
Bailey: "No! Noooooooo! I not!"
Me: "Ugh"
This usually ends up with her in time out or her being sent to her room because she is throwing a fit over the fact that we won't agree with her. These little episodes happen several times a day. This makes it hard for me use teachable moments with her. I'd love to be able to have conversations with her, which is what she wants, but they usually don't turn out pleasant. So now I try and avoid talking with her. "Bailey, please go find something to do." Which still ends in her whining and crying.
I know it sounds like I'm venting here and that's because I am. lol. I'm venting and I'm also accepting any advice on how to handle this, or maybe just a better perspective. What I'd really like to know is, is this just a faze or is this who she is personality-wise? Will she grow out of it? Is there any way I can change the behavior, or do I just ride it out? Should I punish the behavior, or accept it as who she is? Is this the product of how I parent her, or is it just the product of Meng spawn? IS RESISTANCE FUTILE? Ahhh, my little Menglings... love, love, love.
Well, my mother always says, "God made toddlers so darn cute so that it would be too hard to strangle them." I can relate.
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